entry 52. The Rollei.
I’m in love!
Got my hands on an amazing vintage Rolleiflex for a wedding I’m shooting this weekend. Moments ago, I loaded the film, grabbed my light meter and took it for a test run. Clearly I don’t know what the results are yet as I’ve yet to process the film, but the camera itself is amazing. I took to it as a duck takes to water. Everything about the camera is easy for me…intuitive, in fact. The Rollei is more amazing than I remembered, and I remembered it quite fondly.
Lately I had been feeling as if I were in a creative slump. No, it was more than a slump. It was a desert, a total drought. My creative fires were put out and in my drought, I poured myself into the business side of things. Now, the business of being a photographer is a necessary part of the process, but it’s nothing that I particularly enjoy. For me, as with all the photographers I know, it’s about the image. Seeing the image, crafting the image, capturing the image…and finally, holding the image.
In my drought, there were few images in my mind. I tried in vain to create new photomontages, but they never quite went anywhere. There’s this one piece I’m stuck on - she is driving me batty! I’ve worked on her off and on for about a year. Yes, one year. A couple of weeks ago I thought I had figured her out, but as soon as I thought that, she slipped through my fingers just as easily as she had come. Now, this camera has nothing to do with that photomontage, per se. Perhaps by working with this analog equipment, something will open up inside me, lending to greater creativity once again. What that thing is, I cannot say except that within it is the entire reason I am a visual artist.
It’s all about the image.
And it’s all about how the process of discovering and creating that image makes me feel.
Being a creative person it’s especially hard to be in a creative drought. I’m happiest when I’m creating. My life has the most meaning when I’m creating. So, the flip side of that is when I don’t create, I have little joy, little spark. For those of you who know me, you know that my spark is a defining part of my personality; it is the thing that most people say they notice about me. Nobody has said that in a while. But today, after playing with the Rollei, I went to Trader Joe’s. And wouldn’t you know it, not one, but five people commented on how vibrant I was. Five complete and total strangers… I didn’t have any makeup on, and my hair was a knotted mess from driving with the windows down. Which leads me to believe that the inner spark has nothing to do with outer appearances…
I started my photographic journey half my life ago, at the ripe young age of 18. Back then it was all about 35mm - my camera a Canon, just like today. But today it’s a high end digital Canon. I’ve not touched film in too long, until today. I cannot wait to see what else unfolds as a result of this new toy. Yes, I have to give it back, but not before I use it to communicate directly with the Muse…
Here’s to Vision.
Thanks for reading. Be well.
~Liz
